Granfathar always hacks and spits all over our trailor and GEUSS WHO HAS TO CLEAN IT ALL UP.
Like most people of my generation it turned out I didnt even vote this year at all. I thouht about voting then forgot if Im even registered or not. Then what the hell the whole day went by and i didnt vote at all.
As usual my hideous ansesctor claimed he voted more than once. VOTE EARLY AND OFTEN IS MY MOTTOE he always says. For the 2nd time in his life he voted for a Democrat for president. The only othertime was 1964 when he voted for Linden Johnson. But in '64 he liked BOTH candadates and atcually voted for L.B.J. AND Barry Goldwator. Its kind of stupid if you think about it cause each vote canceled out the other.
Granfather also realy liked Dole AND Clinton so he voted for them BOLTH too. Voter freud is easy and its not hard to vote more than once and you can do it in lots of different places especialy if your registered a democrat. Its no secret. As an excuse for his ilegal behavor granfather always brings up that guy who asasinated the Mexicen candidate for President 2 years ago who voted twice in one electon in Los Angeles and it turns out wasnt even a US Citozen. I geuss it doesnt matter: My granfather isnt even a Human and they let HIM vote.
At 2 AM a man from our County party picked him up and then he took a bus and to 2 large cities (he wont say which) and the old fraud was out voting all day in lots of diferent places claiming to be a homeless street person with no adress. This is what he told me. Who the hell knows if you can even beleive him.
He tryed to vote for both Clinten and Dole equaly but lost count after a while. The only incodent was a scuffle with some Perot suporters. There was a bunch ofthem at a polling place wearing Perot buttens (which your probly not allowed to wear in a polling place). Granfather CANT STAND Perrot and says he can tell Perot votters imediatley cause of this crazed look in there eye. The old beast waddled up to them with his walker then reached in his trousors an pulled out his disgustin cheezy jock strap covored with all kind of varied stains (you DONT want to know) an waved the athlettic suporter at them saying: LOOKY HERE WHAT WAS IN MUH SHORTS: THE MOST RESPECTOBLE PEROT 'SUPORTER' ID SEEN YET! The cops threw him out of there on his ass.
Granfathers dislike of Perot ISNT due to his policies--theyve ben aquantances here in Texas for many years and he wrote to Perot once askin for money and never got a reply. OTHORWISE ID VOTE FOR HIM I LIKE THE NASTY LITTLE SUMM'BITCH granfather says.
By late afternoon the old coot returned home wearin a stryofuom strawboater hat and covered all over with buttens and US flags and also a Clinton Gore bumpor stickor stuck to his forhead. (Its still stuck on a week later and WONT come off).
SO HERE IT IS: Granfathers Top 10 Least Favorite Newscastors