Walter Miller's Homepage

Finally, a website the whole fammily can avoid

Janaury 1998 Update

Page 1 of 6

Happy new Year everryone. The holidays have come and gone. Sincear appologies for this updat being a few days late.


In my last update i was in Newyork City for Internet World and then i drove to Califonria AND BACK over Christmas but now Im back home. Plus i am still searchin for a job.

All of these things caused delays. What allot of people dont realize is that i am a real person with real problems and isseus in his life that can cause real delays.

And YES, as you coud of guessed my holidays stunk.

Speakin of things that stink

The sitaution with Granfather has not inproved. Lateley he is more gassy than ever. He is superhuemanly gassy. I dont know what the hell is causing it.

In adition to non-personality rellated gastrointestinnal strife, me and him are also having sort of a feud. It is partley my fault. Mabye it is 10% my falt. The othor 95% is HIS fualt. I will get into that later, as well as some of the funereal fumes and other speciffics of his atmospherric disturbences of the bowel.

But first a few genoral anuoncements:

  • I try to answor all of my mail. Due to volume it may take 5 days or so for me to reply to you. A few heartfelt peices of email that I wanted to answor came back with invallid e-mail adresses. One was from a law student in Tenessee. Others, I just forget to write back and delete by misteak. Please bare with me.

  • Once agian i am not alowed to download atachments. Sorry. If you have somthing for me to look at I am glad to look at it on the web. Thanks.

  • If some of my pages take a long time to load, PLEASE 'refresh' or 'reload'. All the screens shoud be out there.

  • The now-famuous Christmas poem I wrote for the Netly News is RIGHT HERE. Allot of people coudnt find it because it wasnt in my regulor Netly News spot but insted was run as the front page story on Decembor 24, 1997--and hapened to of been spellchecked.

  • Remembor to please pattronize Netly. I promised them hits, and my job there curently hangs by a thread more fragile than the one i am lookin at coming out of Granfather's nose right now, and that one hapens to be transparrent and very treacherousley precipitous, with imminent breakage because of a dead fly dangling from the egde. You get the idea.

  • Peoplle claiming to me ME, (the 'Walter Miller' who writes this homepage), in IRC, chatrooms, mailing lists, BBs, etc., are NOT me. I only comunicate by e-mail, and one note at a time.

  • I do not know of ANY job openings for telecomuters at this time. Sorry.

  • Things are looking better in my own negotiattions for a job as a writer and content develloper for an out-of-town company. I am very ecxited about this. Keep your fingors crossed. That is the good news. There is bad news atached to it, which i will adress in this update.

  • Will the person who played the dirty trick on our car please come foward. I know it is somone from the internet. If you have somthing to say to Granfather, be man enuogh to face the old bastord, like i am. (And if you are truely indeed a woman: Granfather hapens to be, as a mattor of fact, very interested so please contact him agian.)

  • Personal to Reg in Britich Colombia; (my email to you was kicked back as an "invalid adress"): Thanks for your remedy; our goats are not throwing up anymore, plus the mangy areas are receeding just as you said.

  • Personal to Tanya in Califonia; (email kicked back): Try hitting ALT-F9. Or else, ESCAPE and reboot. Also, (concerning that othor matter), Granfather SAYS that he is not "The" Beast as proffisied in the Book Of Revelation but who the hell realy knows. Perhaps he is some sort of Asociate or Assistant Beast if such a theologicol thing exists.

  • Personal to the lady in Ilinois, (email kicked back): Thank you very mutch for your kind offor to deflower me howevor i feel i must decline at this time. I do not get to Ilinnois very often in any case and as a rule I am generally uncomfortoble with online romance. Thank you for your undorstanding in this matter.

  • OK lets get into the update

    I apollogize that this update is so downbeat. There is no fun Christmas sing along page like last year or Seasons Beatings poem like the year beffore. Ive been very down lateley because my life hasnt inproved. My career still floundors along. I am a giant failure.

    Also the othor reason: Granfather is getting worse than ever.

    Yes right this very minnute as i write these words I am being verbolly abused. The old bastord is watchin Beverley Hills 90201 and as usual the inane plot from week to week is too mutch for his tiny lemur-sized brain to handol, so i must sit beside him while it is on and answor his stupid qeustions that he angrilly barks at me all thruout the program. For Granfather, this is recreation.

    I am forced to entortain the bastord.